JacobSanford.com

Vegas Photos Fixed. No more skipping.

Up and running here

You’ll have to download a plugin.. I know, I know - but it’s worth it. I hate plugins too.

Before you view, you need a plugin, I have it hosted locally here. I have scanned for viruses - ‘open’ and run it.

RO, Sco Hop and I discussed the mysterious guitarist BucketHead in a recent gang-email exchange.

We were postulating on his identity, imagining that he was actually someone famous - despite publicity propaganda to the contrary.

RO came up with a plausible idea;

Or what about if he unmasked at the end of a concert and it was Elvis? Then he plays a 20 minute version of Hound Dog, leaves the stage, fakes his death one more time and is never heard from again.

I wonder how long people would talk about that?

They’d talk for a long time.

My cousin Aaron and I were around each other a lot as kids. I used to have a great time heading on up to Bayswater and spending weekends/days with Auntie C and Uncle S and Aaron. They had a huge woodlot around their house and that basically meant unlimited fun. Back then, uncle Steve even had a cool burn barrel out back, which, as a kid was nothing less than fascinating.

I remember one day I was up visiting, we were play-wrestling in the hall and things got out of hand. Aaron was older than me, and thus stronger. I must have been frustrated about losing the match and the situation quickly escalated from a play-fight to a real fight in my mind and I grabbed the nearest item - a grape flavored ‘Big Mouth Pop’ sucker and brained him in the head. Hard.

That ended the fight and I remember getting a scolding over it.. and deservedly so. That sucker was the size of a golf ball and twice as hard.

I told you that story to tell you another. Or maybe I didn’t have to. Hell, it really doesn’t matter, does it?

Anyhoo, Aaron and I used to arm-wrestle in the basement too.

And, as I said, he was older and stronger. But I THOUGHT I was the hero. Cripes, I had watched ‘Over the Top‘ a dozen times and basically considered myself an expert arm-wrestler for my age. Aaron no doubt knew this.

When we’d get down to serious arm-wrestling, for the first few matches he’d let me win.

Then, he’d shake his arm a bit and say ‘give me a minute’ and rub some Noxema into his bicep muscle. He’d work it in really well, rubbing lots into his arm until the skin couldn’t absorb any more. Then we’d settle down for another match and he’d literally destroy me. I’d lose in seconds. And for the rest of the matches I could never take a victory down. It was emotionally devastating.

So, you have to understand, to me, that Noxema had magical powers.

Now, don’t judge Aaron as unfair! He would also offer it to me at the same time, but it never seemed to have the same effect on me as it did him. My strength wouldn’t magically increase - the Noxema simply made my arm tingle and smell bad. It must have been something in the way I applied it. Or how the chemicals interacted with my muscles. I’m still not sure.

I always wondered why the rest of the world had not discovered how Noxema makes you exponentially stronger. I wanted to shout it from the hills, but nobody (Especially adults) ever took me seriously. I didn’t know how to get my message out!

But see, I didn’t have a blog back then. And I do now.